贴标签？Labeling?

English Translation below

你们在什么时候会看到一件东西上贴着标签呢？可能多数在罐头、日常用品、各类食物等“身上”看到标签吧。贴标签是为了让人们知道所吃、用、买的东西到底包 含了什么，是否对自己有利或有害，甚至是做为相互比较的依据。那么，我想借助这个我们天天都会接触到的看到的标签，来谈谈我们每天如何也用着这些标签来 “贴”在我们周围的人的身上。

每一天，我们在上班、上学的途中会遇到一些陌生的脸孔，或一些熟悉但却认不得的脸，或一些非常熟，简直就已经熟透了的朋友的面孔。不管是哪一张脸，我们的 心里都已经在不知不觉下，为对方贴上了一种标签。你们不相信吗？让我举几个例子。你有没有在路上看过染金发的男生，或抽烟的男人，然后第一时间认定他们一 定是什么三教九流的人物。如果对方穿西装、打领带，可能会认为他是个斯文败类，或心中可惜为什么这么个大好青年会因抽烟而断送美好的将来（因抽烟会给予人 们不好的印象）。你是否也有看过穿迷你裙或穿着性感的女生嘴里叼着一根烟，然后与男朋友楼楼抱抱？你是否有一个你本来以为是个品行良好、很负责任的朋友， 而你也为他/她贴上了好好先生或你最要好的朋友等“标签”，但他却做出一些令你意想不到的事情，或一些与你的理念背道而驰的事情来，让你非常失望？

当学生不交功课时，你是否也认为他们懒惰呢？当学生不把衣服穿好，你是否认为他们的品行有问题？当学生染头发（金色或红色，不是黑色！）、抽烟、打耳洞 （男生）、穿着露骨（露股沟、性感），你是否认为他们是坏学生，是无可救药了呢？当学生在班上和你顶嘴，你是否认为他们没有口德？可能现在的你还没有发 现，其实每个人的心中都有一把尺，去衡量其他人，但可惜的是，在对其他人品头论足的同时，我们忘了要自我反省自己的缺点，自己的过错。

当我们为其他人贴上标签后，就很难摒除这种偏见。就比如我有很多朋友因为中国人来新加坡与他们争夺念读大学的位子，在课业方面又名列前茅，所有的A +、A都被他们扫空，以致使自己不能以优秀的成绩毕业。又有一些则受不了中国人、越南人、及一些其他国籍的学生所用的口音，而对他们进行排斥。其实，新加 坡人有一种很奇怪的心理，我们有一种自认比其他人优秀，比其他人更高一等，高高在上的心理，因此当我们面对竞争时，往往由于养尊处优了太久，就会开始埋怨 政府。我们曾几何时会对自己的不够用功，去进行反省，为我们所拥有的一切珍惜而感到满足呢？当我们在为其他人贴上标签的同时，是否会想到对方的感受，是否 会顾及到他们的面子？

人靠衣装，佛靠金装。我们可能外表打扮得很好看，但若内心却一直在检视别人的过错，而不自我反省，那我们将在思想上停滞不前。我看到一班的学生一直在嘲笑、作弄班上一名稍微弱智的学生，让我觉得异常痛心。尽管我尝试与他们讲道理，但由于他们还是普通工艺的学生，他们还很难明白自己行为对于同学所造成的伤害。这种心灵上的伤害比肉体的伤害还要严重，还要深远。我刚看了一个中国中央电视台的节目，题目为“少年英雄”的一个颁奖礼，为的是肯定一群在四川大地震中奋不顾身救出同学的事迹。其中一位身患残疾的学生尤其感动了我，而我也不止一次流下眼泪。我再看看我们的学生，然后想象如果学校发生火灾，到底有几个会伸出援手来救出和自己同窗的同学呢？可能人要到了最危险，生死关头的那一刹那，才能真正发挥出自己内心深藏的“人”/“仁”性吧？这也是为什么有一位中四生告诉我，他认为这个世界的人都没有爱心。那，我问他，什么是爱？你们说呢? 我将尝试在下一篇给一个答案。

我为什么会写这篇短文呢？前天当我经过地铁站时，看到一群青少年穿着光鲜，似乎是中学生，晚上了还在外溜达，而其后我又看到另一群青年，女生在抽烟，男生则蓄长发，说话粗鲁。在我心里，我觉得他们似乎已经学坏了。在那一刹那，不知为何，我又问自己这样一个问题：为什么我要以这种眼光来看待他们呢？他们又没有打家劫舍，做出丧尽天良的事，只不过是一些受不了诱惑的青年想要享受周末夜晚而已。他们有自己的自由，一种无拘无束的自由，这就是年轻的本钱，做事不需付出太多的考虑，太多的责任。每一个人都有他们的强项，都有他们生存的价值，只要尝试去看到他们好的地方，我们看东西的方法将会不同，也将活得更快乐。

讲个小“笑话”。有一位学生告诉我，班上的一位女生认为我长得蛮帅的，让我听了也不禁开心了一会儿。仔细想想，可能不同人的有不同的审美观吧，因此只要你告诉自己，你是最帅最美的，说不定有一天就有人会来夸你了。记得，不要去看别人的缺点，尝试去发掘他们的优点，你将发现世界更美丽。

English Translation:

When and where do you see a label? Maybe mostly on canned food, daily necessities,and all sorts of food products. Labels are there to let us know what we are eating, using or buying, and whether the ingredients/ components are useful or harmful to our body, or even for comparison purposes. So, I would like to use this thing that we come into contact everyday - LABELS, to talk about how we actually use labels to tag the people surrounding us everyday.

Everyday, while we are on our way to work, to school, we always see new faces, or familiar yet unrecognizable faces, or very familiar faces of friends. Whichever face we see, we will unknowingly tag the person with a label. You don't believe me? Let me give a few examples. Have you ever seen boys with dyed hair, or are smoking, and at the 1st instance deduce that they must belong to some gangs or some bad boys. If he is wearing a suit, with a tie, hen maybe you will think that he is a scum in society, or wonder why has this young man waste his future away, smoking his life away. (Smoking leaves a bad impression to others) Have you also seen skimpily dressed girls in mini skirts, with a stick of cigarette between their lips, and hugging and kissing their boyfriends? Have you ever had a friend when you thought that he was someone of great conduct and a responsible friend, and you tagged him/her as a role model or your best friend, only to find out one day that he did something beyond your expectations, or done something that is contrary to your beliefs, and made you disappointed?

When students do not hand in their work, do you think that they are lazy? When students do not wear their uniforms appropriately, do you think that their conduct is flawed? When students dye their hair (gold or red, not black pls!), smoke, pierce their ears (guys), dress up scantily (revealing or sexy), did you think that they are ill disciplined students who are beyond redemption? When students talk back to you in class, do you think that they do not have manners? Maybe you haven't realized, actually in everyone's heart, we have a ruler to judge others, but sad to say, this ruler is not used to judge our own character. When we are criticizing others, we often forget to look back at our mistakes and reflect on them.

When we start labeling others, it will be difficult to erase this biasness. Just like I have many friends in University who have deep biasness with the Chinese from China PRC, as they come to Singapore to fight for the limited vacancies in University intake, and also doing so well in their academics, sweeping away all the A+ and As from the Singaporean students, resulting them from being unable to graduate from University with flying colours. Another bunch of friends just cannot stand the accent of Chinese PRCs, Vietnamese, and some of the accents from other nationalities, and so ostracizing them in the process. Actually, we Singaporeans have a very funny mentality, and that is, we have a mentality of being more superior than others, especially than people from other nationalities. Hence when we meet with obstacles or problems, due to being in our comfort zone for too long, we tend to complain about our government and everything around us. When do we ever blame ourselves for our complacency, lack of diligence, and do self reflection or feel contented with what we already have? When we are labelling others, do we ever think about their feelings, or care about their "face"?

Men rely on their clothes to look good, likewise for the mighty Buddha coated in gold. We can look nice on the outlook, but if we continue to judge and criticize others' mistakes, and do not do self reflection, then our mindset will remain stagnant. I saw students in one of my classes mocking and making fun of a student who is slightly mentally handicapped, and that made me feel very sad. As much as I tried to talk sense to them, but because they are from the normal Technical stream, it is difficult to make them realize the damage that was inflicted on the student. The emotional distress is more serious than physical pain inflicted and it can have a lasting effect. I was just watching a programme on a Chinese Channel (CCTV 4), and it was a show called "Young Heroes", celebrating the brave deeds of the young students during the Sichuan Earthquake. There was this girl who was handicapped, and she managed to save a friend out of the rubble and carry her despite being hit by rocks, and it deeply moved me. Among other touching stories, I teared than once upon the recount of their brave deeds. Then I look at Singaporean students, and imagined that there was a huge fire in school, how many would actually lend a helping hand to save friends or classmates who have been studying with them? Maybe humans will only react and show their true humanity / benovelence, during the most critical moment in life, when they face life and death. This may also be why one of my Sec 4 students told me that he thinks that there is no love in this world. Then, I asked him, what is love to you? Hey readers, what do you think? I will try to provide an answer in the next post.

Now, why am I writing all these? The day before, I was passing by the MRT, and I saw this bunch of young people wearing very "Ah beng" clothes, looking like Secondary school students, still out wandering around late at night; Then I saw another bunch of teenagers, girls smoking, guys with long hair, speaking vulgarities. In my heart, I thought that they have already turned bad. But at the same time, which I do not know why, I asked myself another question: Why am I passing such judgments on these kids? They do not rob, do not steal or kill, in fact, it is just some teenagers who cannot stand the lure of materialism, and whom wanted to enjoy their weekend night. They have their own freedom, an unrestrained freedom, and that is the biggest capital of being young. When you are doing something, you do not consider much, do not pay attention to how much responsibility you need to bear, nor consider about the consequences. Everyone has his own strengths, and a purpose to why they are here in society. As long as you take on a positive mentality to discover their strengths, the things that you see will be different, and you shall also live a more fulfilling and happier life.

Just a "joke" before I end. A student told me yesterday, taht her friend thought that I am actually quite handsome, and that did brighten my day. Come to think of it, different people have different perspective to the definition of "handsome" or "pretty", so you just have to tell yourself that you are the best, and who knows, in time to come, someone will be there to appreciate your beauty. So remember, do not look at others' flaws or shortcomings, try to uncover their merits and strengths, and you will discover a more beautiful world around you.