Relationships.. Love is Blind, or not?

Hmm this is probably be a long post, cos I have got to dedicate this post to my bro (not my real sibling), and her. This has probably one of those things that have been on my mind and I have been wanting to blog about it, yar so.. here it comes..

This is dedicated to you, bro. I am going to talk about my bro's relationship. We met in Project Angel 8 and have since been great friends, and even went on to lead Project Angel 10. Now my bro got to know this gal and fell in love with her.. They have been through much pains before they were finally together, but with my bro bearing more of the pain. Why was this so? Cos love is blind, and I applaud what he has shown me: That, love is also unconditional and not wanting to ask for anything in return. Apparently, his gf have had another bf before him, whom she has loved very much, and she still could not forget this guy. Hence for most of the time, she has been comparing my bro and some guys with her ex bf. After around a year of courtship, they were finally together, and during these period of times, I have heard him say how much he has to devote to pacify and give in to his gf, and I am really proud of him. Such man are rare. Yet this relationship has not been that smooth sailing. Of course they have had their quarrels, and their memorable times, but it seems like it is on his part that he is trying to maintain this relationship, and as much as he wants the relationship to bear fruits, he cannot force it to happen overnight. Like what people says, it takes time to heal. Sometimes, he tells me that he has found it hard to accept the fact that they may break up one day, but he does not mind, and is willing to hold on to it with faith and dedication, cos LOVE NEED NOT BE RECIPROCATED, or love is blind again.

That is why I have a belief, a firm belief that in 90% of breakups/divorces, guys are the ones who initiate it, or are in the wrong. That is because I have heard so many stories from my female friends around me, and most of them have shown evidences that men are the real culprits of breakups, that I tell myself, I must be one of the 10%, whom even if we were to break up, then it must not be something that I have done to hurt her, and she would be initiating it. I find that responsibility is very important in a relationship...

I think I can write a story book on how my female friends have suffered.. Let me recall some of them: Jac, GL, Lay, Jy and many many more..

Finally, this is dedicated to her. Well, I have always thought that what happened to my bro will not happen to me, but funnily enough, heaven always has a way to make fun of you. Recently, I got to know someone, and to me, she is really special, in her own way. Some may find her irritating, or even too noisy, but I realized that after so many years of searching, I thought that I have finally found someone that I can proudly say that I love, but then, sometimes, by a stroke of fate, it so happened that she also had an ex-boyfriend whom she still deeply loves. I do not know if they will ever have another chance of getting together again, because if she does, I will be happy for her, and hopes that this guy do not break her heart again. I think there might not be a possibility of them getting together again, but if she still has someone in her heart, then when will this car drive out of her garage? I do not have an answer, neither does she.

I asked another friend today for advice. She has been with this guy for around 7 years, and cos they have been apart for quite some time, they have drifted apart, and she couldn't really let go, when she had to end this 7 year relationship, due to the bf's change of heart. Though they are stil friends who still meet up, but it took her around 2 years to put down this burden, and to accept another guy, coincidentally, by the same name. She told me that at the end of the day, it is just "执着", or stubborness... That was her 1st boyfriend. She said that love wounds take time to heal, and being the 1st boyfriend has also made it more difficult to let it go just like this. She said that if she has learnt to let it go earlier, it would have been better for her. Now she is happily dating this guy, and they are quite compatible..

So, I ask myself, how much time am I willing to let her heal her wounds.. How would she be able to put down the past, and say that it is time to move on in life? I find it a pity that I can't be that 1st person who occupies her heart, and I know that there will always be that small space in her heart dedicated to this man who have hurt her before. But, I do not know if I would be given a chance to even try to move into her heart. A lost love is irreplaceable, especially when it has been so 刻骨铭心, but if she doesn't let go, then I can only be parking outside her house... Well, I can wait, but I do not have much time, cos of circumstances. Whenever I think of it, I find it hard to breathe..and it seems like there is something nudging my heart.. Hope this feeling passes soon.

I just need a chance.. Will I get a chance? hmm..

I watched a movie with 2 Sec 4 male students yesterday, and I found out that one of them was in love. (Just happened that I saw them there and decided to catch a movie) I congratulated him, and asked him to continue to work hard in his studies. I also told him that I was rejected, and he actually used a chinese idiom to encourage me not to give up, and for that, I thank him. I also offered him an advice, asking him not to treat a relationship as a game, and that he must not be the guy who breaks her heart..

I guess I have written too long, far too long.. 4am in the morn..Love is blind, isn't it? Bro, I will do what is needed, and hopefully, both of us can succeed in getting our halves..

Just an update: I participated in a bowling competition today, and it was a great bowl, 2 games, I got 173, and 211.. and got the best bowler award.. Soo happy.. but, if she was there... Good Night.